Just Watched: Slumdog Millionaire (I like!) and Angels & Demons (I liked the book version better)

Just read: Confessions of an Ugly Stepsister by Gregory Maguire and The Tales of Beedle the Bard by JK Rowling

Both books were light reading. I'm presently collecting receipts from Fully Booked to get a discount card. Help me think this through - should I just go ahead and pay P700 for the discount card or continue to collect receipts? If I accumulate P15,000 worth of receipts, I technically have to spend P1,500 extra to get the card (because the card entitles bearer to 10% discount). Right now, I just need P6,609 more... This is complicated. I'll figure that out next time I decide to buy another book. But if you don't keep your receipts from Fully Booked - may I have them? ;)

Last weekend, I attended the Landmark Forum. Francis already took it 2 years ago but he decided to take it again with me.

Dry description: It's a philosophical discussion (Socratic inquiry) that helps participants examine how they view and consequently react to the world (perception as reality). It promises a transformation.

What I got:
1) Better relationships, particularly with my dad. I hope this lasts (and I'm confident it will).
2) The "possibility" of an extraordinary relationship with Francis. A possibility that is already real :)
3) More courage - to make decisions and speak up.
4) A deeply spiritual experience (although the forum is by no means a retreat).
5) A better understanding of the significance of Integrity.

From WeTheChange.com:

The Landmark Forum is a 3 or 4 day adventure where you are literally locked in a room with 100+ strangers and forced to experience the passing moments. Each day is 12-14 hours long and the format is purely conversational (there is no physical activity). Sound good so far? Landmark Forum leaders give attendees promise of enlightenment, clarity and transformation by the end of the course—and they deliver! Landmark is a truly incredible spiritual growth platform that provides unique insight into the true nature of our thoughts and perceptions and overall is a very rewarding experience.

Would I encourage you to join? To be a participant, one must save up to afford the P25,000 fee. Ouch. However, remember that the Forum gave me access to priceless things. So I would encourage you to join - but in the end, it's your decision :)

How to join: Call 02-8976800, 09178218088, 09178218090

Just read: Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy. I'm so glad. I was beginning to think that I'd never finish reading the book. Took me a good 3.5 months! And it was an interesting read - almost trivial if it weren't for the philosophical inserts. The book was written in 1877 but there are so many feelings, thoughts and actions that still hold true until today, that is, 130 so years since.

Allow me to share a few parts:

On marriage -
Only then did he understand clearly for the first time what he had not understood... He understood not only that she was close to him, but that he no longer knew where she ended and he began... he felt like a man who, having suddenly received a violent blow from behind, turns with vexation in a desire for revenge to find out who did it, and realizes that he has accidentally struck himself, that there is no one to be angry with and he must endure and ease the pain. -Part 5, XIV

On living for something -
...the innkeeper lives for his belly. That is clear and reasonable. None of us, as reasonable beings, can live otherwise...And suddenly the same (Fyodor) says it's bad to live for the belly and that one should live for the truth, for God, and I understand him...! And I and millions of people who lived ages ago and are living now...the poor in spirit and the wise men who have thought and written about it...- we're all agreed on this one thing: what we should live for and what is good. - Part 8, XII *emphases mine

At first, especially during the first few chapters, I was wondering why Leo Tolstoy is considered to be such a great writer. It is only after I finished reading the book that I understood. In the same way, perhaps, it is only after we finish our own books that we will understand :) For now, maybe it's enough not to understand but to agree on what we should live for and what is good.

Angkong (1928-2009)

Taken from a post dated April 2005:

Angkong: Do you love me? (Chinese)
Me: Of course!
Angkong: Really? (Chinese)
Me: Yea
Angkong: Why? Why do you love me?
Me: I dunno...
Angkong: Do you know that I love you? I love you very much (Chinese)
Do you know why?
Me: Why?
Angkong: Because you are my granddaughter (Chinese)

Di si gua e soon.

I was close to my grandfather... I was his princess. I remember him sitting on his big red reclinable chair and me sitting on the soft red rocking chair while examining the little trinkets in his wooden cart - vicks, tiger balm, his comb, the mirror, the fan...

Miss ko na sya.

He told me that I should bring all the boys who come to see me to his room. And then he won't say anything. He'd just nod and I'd know if he approves or not. He's not going to say anything.

Angkong: If I die...
Me: Di pa, tagal pa noh
Angkong: If I die, will you cry? (Chinese)
Me: Of course
Angkong: Truly? (Chinese)
Me: Yes, a lot.

My grandfather, a really truly great man, died last Monday February 16, 2009. He was 82 and had lived an amazing life. As my cousin said, to live just 1/4 of the life he lived would already be something.

I'm glad I was able to say I love you and goodbye to my Angkong before he passed away. For this I have Francis to thank and I'm happy that I was able to introduce them to each other.

I kept my word Angkong, I cried. I'm so proud of being your granddaughter. Thank you for everything I enjoy, rest well now knowing that you have given your family more than enough. I won't forget you.

Gua ya tia di.